Cosmo J Weil

Hello. My name is Cosmo J. Weil. I died on Columbus Day, 2008, at the age of 17.

I was Bob J's cat sister. I was the most beautiful of all the cats. But I am sure completely forgot to say anything about me. I will have to go kick his butt when I am done writing, which I can do again, since he is dead, too.

My Boyfriends

When I was alive, I dated only baseball players. And only stars. No benchwarmers! I dated David Justice, until I dumped him in favor of Derek Cheater—I mean, Jeter—who left me for a screechy voiced little wench. But Derek and I reconciled, and we would sometimes go out to clubs in New York. The last time we went, we met up with some guy who called himself "The Boss". Looked more like "A Loss" to me, but Derek said he was important, so I couldn't bite him. But I did anyway. What a jerk.